To all the penny-pinching, coupon-cutting, swimming-in-bills, barely-making-ends-meet, two-job-holding, work-your-butt-off, feel-like-giving-up-sometimes, cry-yourself-to-sleep, taking-life-a-day-at-a-time, drowning-in-grace single moms: Happy Mother’s Day.
God is good and sees your situation. Take comfort. He knows.
“You are the God who sees me, ” for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.” Genesis 16:13
I’m a statistic. I fall under the category of “heard the Gospel before the age of twenty-five.” People who keep tabs on statistics when people hear the Gospel say that most do as young adults. That was me. But unlike many people my age in 1991 Manila, I was a young mom and wife at twenty-two. Unlike my peers who were enjoying college life, I dropped out at nineteen, pregnant and barely two years in to getting a degree in Literature from the comfortably Catholic De La Salle University.
It was fear of the future and the unknown that pushed me into a relationship with my Lord and Savior. The Gulf War had broken out, and I was deathly afraid of the future. I think becoming a parent made me fearful. “What kind of world would my daughter grow up in?” constantly raced through my mind and kept me up at night.
I don’t know how to describe our journey from Orlando to Nashville any other way than by describing it as an act of God. If you’ve ever read my blog, “Exits and Entrances,” you’re familiar with the adventure that Kyera and I have been on since 2007. From the moment I decided to return to the US after twenty-seven years, to the eight weeks I had to endure not knowing if Kyera would be allowed to follow me, to the first two years of our life here in the US — she for the first time, me for the second time — moving from Orlando to Nashville has been an exciting journey that can only be attributed to God.
Drove a 21' truck with a 15' trailer more than 800 miles, 650 of which in the rain, to Nashville. Exhausted, stoked, grateful, speechless.—
Thelma Bowlen (@thelmabowlen) April 03, 2009
Of all our three dogs (they’re all adopted), Oscar the Havanese is the most in love with me. So much so that he literally follows me anywhere I go throughout our house. I stand up to get something from my room upstairs, he follows. I get up from the couch to get a glass of water from the kitchen, he is right behind me. Even when I walk to the bathroom, Oscar trails me like a shadow, looking up at me as if to say: “Where are we going? I’m with you, Mom.”
When a noise outside our front door sets all three boys on a barking spree, Oscar is the only one who runs to me, and with his paws on my knees, looks up and softly whimpers: “Mom, there’s a noise outside. Can’t you hear it? It’s scary! Mo-om!”
He takes every chance he can to sit next to me on the couch, and lays his head on my chest and looks up into my eyes.
When I’m out of town on business, Oscar is the most miserable. He sulks and stares at the door, hoping I’ll walk in.
He just can’t get enough of me. I am the end all, be all of his existence.
This is my one word for 2012.
It’s from one of my favorite Psalms, the 126th one. The verse that I love the most is the first:
When the LORD restored the fortunes of Zion, we were like those who dreamed.
I’ve been in such a dark and lonely valley for the most part of 2011, but I know that right beside me, my Savior stays and holds me by me right hand, and tells me constantly of His fierce, passionate love for me, even when I refuse to hear Him.
It’s been so dark that I’ve forgotten how to dream.
That’s what I’m looking forward to in 2012. Being restored.
How about you?
on airport shuttle to get my daughter!!!—
Thelma Bowlen (@thelmabowlen) November 13, 2007
Just landed in Orlando! In one piece! Hehe. Missing people but excited to see mom.—
Kyera Legaspi (@kyerabee) November 13, 2007
i felt like i gave birth again. only this time she's 17 and i didn't have to wait 9 months! i looove her sooo much.—
Thelma Bowlen (@thelmabowlen) November 14, 2007
falling into a deep and blissful sleep for the first time in 8 weeks.—
Thelma Bowlen (@thelmabowlen) November 14, 2007
Our plan last year was to get a live tree this Christmas to help support local, small business owners instead of The Man who imports trees made in China. The Man being nationwide franchises like Walmart, Target, Kmart, etc. You get the picture.
The plan was: Buy tall-ish live tree outside the Walmart on Nolensville, buy lights from inside Walmart, and head home to make an event out of tree decorating. We were even planning on getting more decorations since the ones we had were barely enough to cover our five-foot tall Kmart-bought plastic tree with built-in lights.
That was the plan.
So after Christmas 2010, our faithful little two-year old Chinese tree was returned to its box for good — taped up, and then brought to a drive-thru Goodwill Drop Off.
And then life happened this year. Hospital trips both emergency and elective came along with the loss of my part-time job, and we’ve been pinching pennies and making budget cuts since the end of August.
While I was at our organization’s Winter Conference, Kyera sent me a text message:
“Where’s our tree? I was going to put it up but it’s not in our storage.”
“Are you sure? Did we donate it? I can’t remember.”
“Oh right! LOL. We did!”
Up until yesterday, I kept thinking about getting a tree. Definitely not a live one because they’re expensive, but a Chinese one bought from The Man. A five-foot tall tree is $80 now, fifty percent off, at Target, but I just couldn’t bring myself to spend that much on a tree when that money could and should go to groceries. When your priorities are down to food, clothing, shelter, and medical bills, there’s absolutely no room for “Christmas Tree” in the budget. Or clothing for that matter. Food and shelter is far more important. And paying medical bills.
I thought Kyera and I would not make it out of 2010. Little did I know that 2011 would take the cake! It’s been a medically dramatic year for us both. Medical Issues always come with their twin, Medical Bills, but I’m thankful that we work for an organization that provides insurance.
Thank you, 2011, for your ups and downs, so far:
It only makes sense that I start my list with my hospital stay on my birthday! Kyera and I were in Orlando for Every Nation’s 2011 North American Conference, Dream, at Disney World when I landed in the ER with severe stomach pain. Our human resources director, Carolyn Foster, was my nurse/nanny/confidant/cheerleader for three days, giving up her time with her family, and missing out on almost all of the conference sessions because of me and my diverticulitis. Everyone needs a Carolyn in their life.
There’s no escaping the fact that Americans are facing a new economic reality. The Occupy movement started on Wall Street with people taking to the streets to “no longer tolerate the greed and corruption of the 1%,” the 1% being the wealthy. The 99% are the rest of America who struggle to make ends meet. They are the ones who have “occupied” Wall Street. Occupy has since grown from the streets of New York, to other cities, including Nashville, and so has the birth of other blogs from the other percentages of wealth.
There’s the 1 percent who stand with the 99 percent, America’s wealthiest who believe in wealth redistribution and higher taxes on the rich, and then there’s the 53%, the ones who work long hours and stay away from debt who say the issue on Wall Street is an issue of personal responsibility.
I came across these two posts randomly as I sifted through our organization’s official Twitter account. Some of the people the account follows retweeted these updates.
They’re both good reminders of Who I belong to.
You have the power right now to live a joy-filled, faith-filled, peace-filled life. But u need this mindset, “God, I’m totally trusting You”—
Joel Osteen (@JoelOsteen) October 26, 2011
Friend, no matter what your circumstances may look like today, God’s plan is to bring you through to a place of abundance..—
Kimberly Jones (@RealTalkKim) October 26, 2011
Have you come across anything that’s lifted your spirit lately?
